People

12:00 am Stupidity, Travel

They’re a dumb bunch, aren’t they? And for some reason, rarely more so than when at the helm of a motor vehicle. Driving from Kent to the West country the other day I lost count of the number of people sitting in the middle lane regardless of what was going on around them. Once it got dark, these were the same people who had their rear foglights on despite the clear conditions. Naturally there was no shortage of brand new BMWs being driven in that uniquely aggressive manner that ownership of a brand new BMW seems to encourage. None of these, however, could match the sheer stupidity of the guy trundling along in a ZX estate at 10.30pm at night in the rain… With just his sidelights on. Ah well, I dare say that natural selection will soon run its course.

The really scary thing is that all of these people are almost exactly the same ones who’ll be captivated by the Conservative’s latest election broadcast masterstroke. A load of wiffle about how petrol will be £1.30 a litre under Labour (it’s their favourite “stealth tax”, apparently - like no-one would notice petrol prices going up by 50%…) over pictures of people looking glumly out at their cars gathering dust on the driveway. Actually I found the images of cars standing idle quite heartwarming (I gave the sequence with the chap in the wheelchair stuck indoors because, presumably, he couldn’t afford to drive his car anywhere as much credence as such a wildly cynical electioneering ploy deserved, ie none whatsoever).

Disappointingly, no-one’s been round our house canvassing yet. I’ve been practising my best Paxmanesque enquiries for ages in eager anticipation of some snivelling power-hungry buffoon knocking on the door looking for my support, but no dice so far. There’s still time, though…

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